it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
