You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Randomize
