I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize
