am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
Randomize
