my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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