one two three fourrrrnication!
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
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