Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
tell your sister to shave her snatch
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
