talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
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