So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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