it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Randomize
