There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
i need an iv and a liver transplant
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Randomize
