how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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