Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
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