I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
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