A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Randomize
