We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
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Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
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Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.