Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
Randomize
