that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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