Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
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