I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
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