Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
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