you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
I have already put on my inside pants.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
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