i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.