dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
