So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
Randomize
