Listen the way I know if I'm drunk is if I have stage fright in the pisser if I do then I'm not drunk! And I definitely still do right now!
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
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