You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
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