I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
