fml, blew my nose and red sprinkles came out and did the splits when i sneezed
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
they need to just BURY HIM!
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
