I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Randomize
