1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Randomize
