Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(434): View more from Virginia

did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?

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(434): did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace? http://tfl.nu/alh3

Replies (1) Good night (791) Bad night (873)
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(501): View more from Arkansas

My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.

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(501): My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship. http://tfl.nu/h697

Replies (56) Good night (816) Bad night (4841)
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(571): View more from Virginia

i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.

(570): View more from Pennsylvania

so you made the shocked face and they caught you.

(571): View more from Virginia

yup.

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(571): i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise. (570): so you made the shocked face and they caught you. (571): yup. http://tfl.nu/1dzq

Replies (19) Good night (1434) Bad night (5295)
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(305): View more from Florida

I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.

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(305): I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him. http://tfl.nu/ngz7

Replies (19) Good night (834) Bad night (4486)
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(519): View more from Ontario

i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?

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(519): i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends? http://tfl.nu/08w4

Replies (101) Good night (34520) Bad night (3884)
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(847): View more from Illinois

Whoa, Gary Coleman died

(224): View more from Illinois

Whatchu talkin bout?!?!

(847): View more from Illinois

Too soon.

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(847): Whoa, Gary Coleman died (224): Whatchu talkin bout?!?! (847): Too soon. http://tfl.nu/36gw

Replies (49) Good night (7102) Bad night (1794)
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(734): View more from Michigan

He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.

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(734): He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another. http://tfl.nu/sx70

Replies (11) Good night (4402) Bad night (1602)
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(306): View more from Saskatchewan

I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.

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(306): I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park. http://tfl.nu/fvsb

Replies (5) Good night (3435) Bad night (903)
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(780): View more from Alberta, CA

Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.

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(780): Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something. http://tfl.nu/bxdz

Replies (7) Good night (1202) Bad night (853)
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(512): View more from Texas

he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white

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(512): he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white http://tfl.nu/k2oa

Replies (10) Good night (623) Bad night (2029)
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(607): View more from New York

To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.

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(607): To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail. http://tfl.nu/vfu4

Replies (5) Good night (1520) Bad night (581)
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(973): View more from New Jersey

He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.

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(973): He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me. http://tfl.nu/2l9a

Replies (10) Good night (550) Bad night (1497)
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(914): View more from New York

He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.

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(914): He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen. http://tfl.nu/pgtg

Replies (3) Good night (1986) Bad night (569)
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(408): View more from California

i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still

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(408): i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still http://tfl.nu/f9lt

Replies (3) Good night (283) Bad night (461)
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(202): View more from Washington, DC

I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.

(202): View more from Washington, DC

Naked.

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(202): I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out. (202): Naked. http://tfl.nu/m66x

Replies (1) Good night (501) Bad night (614)

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