it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You brought string cheese to the strip club
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
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