Quick, to the slutcave!
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize
