Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
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