Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
