Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Randomize