so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
We smell like vodka and hangover
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