Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Randomize
