it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Randomize
