you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
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