I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
