Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
Randomize
