There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
