I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
