you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
Randomize