Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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