what if every blade of grass was a penis?
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Randomize
