i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
Randomize