Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
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