Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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