i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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