Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I*** M*****, this is your dignity texting you. I ditched you when you started hitting on bros and old sailor men last night. My friend Sarah has pictures to prove it.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Randomize
